(This box is just a song..not a video)
Can someone do me a favor and kick me up my ass please?! I really need it!
I dunno what's going on with me lately, but I just can't get motivated. I'm starting my own studio CD in a few weeks and you'd think I'd be shouting from the roof tops, which I have been, but it kinda feels forced. Don't get me wrong, this is all I've ever wanted to do, plus they're using my own songs too, but I dunno......maybe past experience has made me wary? It's just a shame that caution can sometimes overlook the fun in things.
I've been writing new songs all the time, but none sound right to me. The tunes are fine (which I have in my head), but I'm having trouble with the actual lyrics. I used to be able to sit down and write a song, depending what mood I was in, but it's a whole other story now, so rather than force the subject, I'm gonna leave it for a while and see what I come up with without pressuring myself.
They all seem to be along the same theme, and with recent events, a lot of the songs depict anger, which is not what I'm about. Obviously, like all of us, it's there, but there's no need for me to keep going back to the same well. I'm sure I can break out of this and move on soon enough..........
My eye's fine now. In fact, there was hardly any swelling at all the day after, witch I really expected! It wasn't even 'Gungie'....eww..lol! The lump's still there kinda, but it's getting smaller and smaller. I guess it's like a lady's bump when she has a baby. It fades over time?
There's actually something I'd like to say here in regards to a comment left for me in my last entry and I apologise right now, but I have to say it.
I didn't appreciate someone's 'Grow up' comment at all. I thought it was inconsiderate, badly timed and definitely not called for in any way. I understood what this person was TRYING to say, and they even ended the comment on a light note, but I still don't understand the 'Grow up' remark. You have no REAL idea about who I am at all, and I think I've grown up quicker than most, so please don't judge before you know anything. I don't think I said anything childish at all. The nurse held my hand herself. I didn't ask for it, but even if I had, I'd be proud to let you know that too.
...'if they told you eye operations don't hurt they were correct. You should have asked them about operations on the eye lids. That is bound to hurt some'
Do you think I'm a moron? I was having an eye lid procedure so the doctors had ONLY told me about THAT actual procedure. Why would I ask them to tell me about eye procedures when I was having an eye LID procedure?! I asked about what I was having done specifically, and YES, they did tell me that my procedure wouldn't hurt, but let's face it, it's BOUND to hurt and I knew that before I went in. I AM NOT a childish idiot as some people like to make out. It's like someone going in for a knee op but asking them about an operation on their hips. WHO WOULD DO THAT?! That's what you implied and it pissed me off.
'Grow up, we all have to suffer pain some times in our life. It helps us regale in the days when we are painfree.'
Yes, I complained and commented about the pain, but Iwasn't over reacting, it DID hurt so why should I lie and say that it was all ok?! I knew that pain would be an obvious part of the procedure and I knew it was necessary, so please don't treat me like an idiot. I'm 23, not 13. I felt that I had a right to come into my OWN journal and complain about it. After all, it IS my journal and that's why we write these things, and I'm not going to change the way I write for anybody!
Maybe I'm over reacting, but I'm so sick of people's judgements and comments toward me lately, in real life, and online. Fortunately, it doesn't happen very often in here to me, but I've seen MANY examples of it in others. I mean, if you don't like the journal or the person writing it, there's a big red cross at the top right hand side of the page that will sort your problems out for you. Try using it!
Anyways, I'm back to work tomorrow as I had Tuesday off for my eye (as instructed before anyone calls me childish), and I'm actually looking forward to seeing everyone.....and yes, I can see...lol! I've got a good group of friends there now. None of them read this but I just wanna say 'HEY GUYS!'..lol!
Hope you're all doing well! Catch ya later